Olamide as a story
When I read through the bible sometimes, it amazes me how much was documented and how for more than a millennia after, many faithful still look at the fine print and find some comfort.
Though some may say that the bible is fictional, especially with the wild stories in it, e.g., the story of the boys who were gobbled up by a bear after they threw curse words at the bald Elisha, the stories and characters in the bible has resonated with millions over the ages.
What stands out for me most is how the deficiencies of all these people were documented and put out into the universe for everyone to see. From the king who was a murderer and adulterer, who was still referred to as the Beloved of God, to the water to wine story, the bible and its almost unbelievable scenarios helped me see that sometimes, to make a difference, all we have to do is tell our story.
How it started
I’ve always thought of how wonderful it would be to write about my life experiences and help others on their journey but I never seemed to be able to quite get to it. It didn’t help that I was very hesitant as I tried to sift through the volume and the richness of my life. Over the years, under the moniker, Lami’s Memoirs, I wrote small notes and poems on social media and nothing else. Many times, I was asked by my friends to start a blog but it always felt like too much work.
I think I was a little lazy.
2020 came with a new light. Or darkness like it felt. It was a point of origin for me. A tabula rasa.
The world slowed down for me to pick up and get to where I needed to be. All of the crutches that had held me up suddenly seemed to melt away, and I was alone with my dark and creepy thoughts and went about aimlessly until late 2020. After I finished penning down the last word of Reflections, my entry in Hell Hath No Fury: An African Christmas Romance Anthology, I found the answer. It was a eureka moment.
Writing was therapeutic!
The memoir…
Instead of focusing on my whole life and writing an autobiography, I decided to take 2020 as the focal point. It is worthy to note that in order to move forward, one has to take some detours into the past. So, gradually, I found a way to look at my past this time, seeing it with different eyes.
At the end of my fifth draft, I saw that I was still holding back so much more. I’d done a lot of paraphrasing as I didn’t want to shine too much light on my life. After all, there was only so much I needed the world to know about me. It was a tale of how I broke my shell, but somehow, the journey was embarrassing.
As I typed away at my computer, I came to a new understanding. Every day, the new experiences I was having helped me see the past differently. Every emotion, negative and positive, I’d felt, was for a reason. Gradually, I began to see that the constant factor in all the pain that I’d ever felt, was me.
Love is a choice
The Girl in the Mirror is a story of a 31-year-old woman who has come to a conscious understanding that all the results that she is looking for lie in her. Unlike she previously thought, happiness is not fleeting. In her reality, she is queen, and the only experiences that she wants are what she calls to herself.
Just like the bible and its negative and positive stories, I tell it all. Humans are almost always compulsively drawn to only sharing stories that put them in a positive light. The downside is that they show a perfect image to the world and fail to get help when they should.
Let’s face it, who is really perfect?
The Girl in the Mirror is a tale about imperfect me, who every day, is becoming a better version of herself.
Indulge yourself in 180 pages of a mind-blowing and inspiring read.
Excerpt from Chapter 2- To My Sixteen-Year-old Self
“Not again, you thought. You would be seen again by Timi as the girl who was always antsy and could never quite sit still. The hyperactive girl who often jumped to conclusions and could not keep a secret.
Although you knew that wasn’t you anymore, you had blown your chance to make it right and it made you sad. As the litany of thoughts flooded your mind that afternoon, you resigned to fate as you knew you were definitely going to fail. The results came in and you scored 152; 48 points shy from the cut-off mark.
Not to worry, you’ll feel better in time. Life happens in different ways and you’ll continue to live your life forward. You’ll eventually pass on the third trial and get into the university. You’ll realize that your past is in the past and all you can do is to keep moving.
Only your new experiences matter and you’ll go through life with a spring in your step. Mostly. You’ll stop being anxious every time you see a puddle of water on the road, wondering the best angle to cross it even before you ever get there.
Your teen years are the foundation of what becomes you and every little experience will count. Stop overthinking every single thing. You only make your ‘problems’ bigger than they truly are. Even as the tears fall from your eyes and you wonder if everything will ever be alright, I want you to know that tough times never last. Only tough people do. And girl, you are stronger than you think…”
Synopsis
2020 meets Olamide at a crossroad.
In a world that is almost unkind to ageing women, Olamide is nearing 30, unmarried, and without any kids. For all of her career life, she has worked at the same job and watched as the world seemingly passed her by. There’s not much joy around as every day, she becomes a little more jaded and unfulfilled. And though she tries to please as many people as possible, for some reason, her friendships and relationships often go up in smoke.
Even as the world undergoes a makeover, Olamide’s long-term relationship comes to a practical end after a pretty tumultuous journey. She is then involuntarily compelled to rethink her life path. The lockdown of 2020 and the subsequent depression that it ushers in doesn’t make it any easier. ‘It is easier said than done,’ one more person says to her when she talks about her odyssey and the hard calls and mistakes she has made.
As she detaches herself from all the noise and distractions that the world has to offer, and retreats to the inner recess of her mind for an honest analysis.
Who will emerge victorious?
Her demons, pain or true self?
Find out in The Girl in The Mirror.
Where to find the book?